T-minus one week. Again, a lot of information gleaned in the past 8 days and all of it moved us into the direction of final decisions/actions. Last Wednesday I saw the surgeon in clinic. After being so nervous about the final decision day, it was anti-climactic.
*surgeon clears throat….”So, are we going ahead with this?”
“Um, yes, let’s do it. I just have a few questions about surgery.” I pull out my full sheet of notes/questions.
*surgeon smiles. He knows me too well already.
Bottom line: surgery is on for the 28th. My only question that needed to be addressed over the past several days was a double and triple check (second/third opinions) on my pathology slides from my biopsy. The original diagnosis of ADH has been confirmed (and double confirmed) and all is settled. All my questions have been answered. Things are settled. I am relieved. I am ready. I am scared.
Now on to the boring stuff…..attempt to organize my life in a way for things to run smoothly during my recovery. Wow. I do a lot in a day. It is not an easy process to lift a busy mom out of the equation, even with a very involved dad. I am currently surrounded by lists. Lists of what to do before surgery, lists of things to get done this week, lists of dates we need meals, rides home for kids, etc. I am humbled by the number of people in my life willing to dig in and help.
This week will be tough. Last load of bras in the laundry have been done. I had to take a photo. I will be sad to never wear them again. I will be relieved to never wear them again.
This week will go fast. I have many things to check off the list. A few friends to share some wine and laughs, to help pass the time. Celebrate my big kids’ twelfth birthday. I want it to go fast. I want it to go slow. I want to not forget what my body feels like this week. I want to know what it will feel like next.